Getting a woman to like you is one thing, but getting her to fall in
love with you is a whole new ball game. If you have that loving feeling
for your lady and want to feel the love back, then you have to work on
making her feel special, letting her recognize how amazing you are, and
making the relationship grow strong over time. The important thing is to
play your cards right and not to rush it. If you go about it the right
way, then your woman will be falling for you before you know it.
Part 1 of 3: Winning Her Over
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1
Keep things light at the beginning. Though you may be
desperate for your woman to fall in love with you, you can't try too
hard, at first, or you'll scare her off. You have to let things progress
naturally and for your relationship to deepen before you even think
about the love part. If you've only been together for a few weeks, or a
month or two, then you should keep things light and fun, and avoid
mentioning the "L" word, or it may not have the effect you're hoping
for. Work on charming her first, being playful, and having a fun and
dynamic relationship, before you move into the deeper stuff.
- Of course, every relationship moves at its own pace. If you think
you're both really approaching love after a few months, then dive in!
But make sure that you're looking for love with this specific woman, not
just love in general.
- If you open up too much in the beginning, then she won't feel like
she has to work to earn your trust. Make it a little harder to see your
deeper side, and it'll be worth it.
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2
Let her know you think she's special. If you want the
woman to fall in love with you, then she has to see why she's so
important to you. Without smothering her or freaking her out, you can
let her see that you know she's one of a kind and that she really means a
lot to you. She can't feel like just another girl you're dating, can
she? Here are some ways to let her know that you really like her and
think she's totally unique:
- Say something like, "I've never met someone like you before. You're just so easy to talk to."
- Tell her she's not like other girls. Then let her know why. Be specific.
- Make an extra effort to do something special for her so that she feels special. If you keep having the same boring old dates, then she won't feel like she stands out to you.
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3
Be a gentleman. Who says chivalry is dead? You don't
have to ride up on a horse to pick her up for a date, but you should
make an effort to treat her like a lady. Part of being a gentleman is
having stellar manners, and putting in the effort to treat people
correctly. If you do this, then she will take notice, and will be on her
way to falling for you. This doesn't mean that you should act nothing
like yourself and have to get all weird and formal, but it does mean
that you should try a bit harder if you want her to keep caring for you.
Here are some things any old gentleman can do:
- Give her your coat if she's cold
- Have proper table manners
- Put her needs before your own when it comes to having the best seat, the last bite of food, etc
- Hold open doors and car doors for her
- Pull out her chair
- Be generally attentive to her needs
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4
Show that you care about who she is. If you want a
woman to genuinely fall in love with you, then you have to show her that
you see her as more than just an object or a trophy to be won. You have
to let her see that you actually care about who she is as a person,
about what she wants, what her dreams are, and what her experiences have
been. You shouldn't interrogate her, but at the same time, you have to
make an effort to know who she really is besides the fun-loving,
beautiful woman you see in front of you. Here are some things to ask her
about:
- Her childhood
- Her favorite memories
- Her friendships
- Her relationships with her family members
- Her hopes for the future
- Her job or her career goals
- Her passions or hobbies
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5
Don't smother her. If you want a woman to fall for
you, then you can't crowd her all the time. You can't force a woman to
fall in love with you, and the more you're around and calling and
texting her all the time, the less likely she is to really feel it. For
the woman to really evaluate her feelings about you, she needs some
distance and space to think about you. If you're always around, asking
what she's up to, or telling her how amazing she is 24/7, that won't
speed up her feelings of love for you. If you let her know you care but
give her space at the same time, then she'll be much more likely to fall
for you.
- Just like guys are turned off by women who come on too strong, so
are women. Find a balance between letting her know how much you like her
and giving her space.
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6
Impress her with your independence. Having your own
life and doing your own thing is related to not smothering the woman. If
you want her to fall for you, then you have to make her see that you're
a person who is worth falling for, not just a puppy dog she can keep on
a leash. Hang out with your guy friends. Spend some time training for a
marathon, playing guitar, or pursuing your favorite hobby. Maintain a
career that means something to you. The more happy you are on your own,
the more the woman will want to be around you.
- Nobody wants a guy who wants to spend 300 hours a week in bed
watching TV with them. People want partners who are dynamic and have
their own hopes and dreams, while making time for their significant
others.
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7
Give her sincere compliments. Another way to win a
girl over is to give her compliments that actually mean something. This
means you should go beyond telling her how pretty she is, and dig deeper
to let her know which attributes really mean something to you. Of
course, complimenting her looks will make her feel good, too, as long as
it's not the only thing you're complimenting. Look for unique aspects
of her personality or her life that are really worth complimenting, and
she'll see that you really care. Here are some things you can say:
- "You always know how to crack me up, even when I'm having a bad day."
- "You're so good at talking to almost anyone. My Grandma Pearl could have talked to you for hours! What a gift."
- "I've never seen eyes that are the same shade of blue as yours."
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8
Give her your attention. If you want to win a woman
over, then you have to actually pay attention to her. This may sound
obvious, but you'd be surprised by the amount of guys who repel women by
constantly checking their phones, looking around the room, or just
zoning out whenever they talk to them. Though you don't have to get all
intense and creepy and make Houdini-like eye contact every time you're
together, just make an effort to look at her, put your body toward her,
and put that phone away whenever you're together.
- You'll be surprised by the huge difference this makes. If she sees
that you're not distracted when you're together, she'll really start to
understand that you care, and she'll care, too.
Part 2 of 3: Developing Your Connection
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1
Open up to her. If you want to deepen your bond and
to move closer to love, then you have to open up to the woman as your
relationship progresses. You can't tell her everything about yourself at
first, or she'll feel like there's no mystery there, but once you've
been together for a while, slowly let her know about the things that
matter to you. This could mean talking about your real dreams for the
future, discussing a complicated friendship from the past, or even
revealing your biggest fears.
- If you open up to her and let her know that you don't do this with everyone, she'll see that she really means something to you.
- The more you open up to her, the more she'll open up to you, and the deeper your connection will grow.
- Obviously, save the really serious and intense stuff for when you
know each other better. You don't want to scare her off too early on.
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2
Be supportive. If you want a woman to really fall in
love with you, then you have to be there to support her when she needs
you. This means anything from going to support her in the school play or
building her up before a job interview. You'll need to be there for her
when she's nervous about something, having a bad day, or just figuring
out her life. This is a quality any woman looks for in a life partner,
and if you want her to really fall for you, then she has to see that
you'll be there for her through the good times
and the bad.
- This doesn't mean that woman constantly need to be built up, either.
But it does mean that you should be there for her when she needs you,
and that she should do the same for you.
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3
Be dynamic. If you want the woman to really fall for
you, then you have to impress her with your ability to do and try new
things, and just to keep things interesting and exciting. This doesn't
mean you should get a motorcycle and start doing backflips in your
living room, but it does mean that you should keep an eye on the
unconventional and exciting things that would take your relationship to
the next level. If you do the same old thing or talk about the same old
thing all the time, then the woman may begin to get a little restless.
- This includes being dynamic in your conversations, too. If you're
always talking about sports or the same old thing, it may get old. Read
the news, read literature, watch documentaries, and just do things that
make you a more interesting person -- so that you can keep her interest.
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4
Win over her friends and family. If you want a woman
to really fall in love with you, then you have to work hard to make sure
that her friends and family also like you. They don't have to be madly
in love with you, but they should see that you're a nice guy, a caring
person, and, most importantly, someone who loves and is a good fit for
the woman he's dating. Be kind and polite to her family, be fun and
sweet around her friends, and most importantly, show that you really
care about her. In the end, that's the biggest thing they're looking for
-- not how much money you make or how cute you are.
- Avoid getting in heated fights or political debates with her friends and relatives. It's just not worth it.
- If you really don't like one of the woman's relatives or friends,
it's best to keep your mouth shut, in most cases. The woman won't like
it if you're threatening one of the relationships she's had much longer
than she's known you.
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5
Do the little things. Send her flowers on a random
Thursday. Write her a sweet note before she leaves for work. Send her a
text to say you're thinking of her. Cook her a meal when you know she's
had a long day. Massage her feet if she's feeling tired. Though you
shouldn't be her love slave, you should take the time to do little
things that make her really feel loved and cared for.
- These little things do add up. Don't think you can just ignore her and then put the charm on when it's time for date night.
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6
Let her see that you'll be a good long-term partner.
If you want a woman to fall for you, then you have to make her see you
as more than just a hot, exciting prospect who is perfect for
right now.
Let her see that you're responsible, caring, smart, fun to be around,
and an all-around good long-term bet. This may sound like a tall order,
but it's really not. You just have to be your best self and make her see
that you're Mr. Right, not just Mr. Right Now.
- Being responsible is a big plus. If she sees that you can balance
your checkbook, cook dinner, and do what needs to get done, she'll be
very impressed.
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7
Listen to her. Face it: most guys can brush up on
their listening skills. You may be too busy planning what you have to
say next, or trying to think of what to say to impress your woman, to
really listen to everything she's telling you. Well, that stops today.
When you're talking, drop your distractions, look her in the eyes, and
take in what she's telling you. Don't try to solve her problems or give
an opinion on everything -- just be there as a person for her to listen
to when she wants to talk.
- Pick up on all the details she's telling you. If you mention them later, she'll be impressed.
- Don't try to relate everything she's saying to your own experiences. Listen to her on your own terms.
Part 3 of 3: Making It Last
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1
Never stop trying to impress her. If you really want
her to fall in love with you -- and to stay that way -- then you always
have to keep making the effort. You've got to bring her flowers on
random days. You should dress up for date nights. Come up with new
things to do together. Never give up on trying to make her laugh. Don't
quit on her if she's in a bad mood. Just keep working your charms and
working hard to keep her, because the second you get complacent, you'll
be in trouble.
- Don't think that, once you've both said you love each other, you've
got this in the bag. You always have to keep making an effort, whether
you're 20, 30, or 80.
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2
Build your interests together. If you want your
relationship to keep going strong, then you should build a list of
things that you do together. It can be Sunday morning hikes. Reading
together near the fireplace. Making Italian meals together. Going wine
tasting. Running. For the love to keep burning strong, you two can't
feel like completely different people with different interests. You have
to have a few things that are just for the two of you, which you love
doing together as you build your relationship.
- On the other hand, this doesn't mean that you should share all
of the same interests -- you don't have to go to yoga just to please
her, and she doesn't have to watch your favorite TV show with you if
it's not her thing. Having your own interests that you maintain will
help you grow stronger, too.
- Grow together, not apart. As you move forward, you will both develop
as individuals. The more interests you share and the more time you
spend together (within reason), the more likely you are not to go your
separate ways.
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3
Remember to maintain your independence. While you
should work on doing things together, it's important to stay focused on
your own goals and pursuits, too. If you're always together, your love
will fail fast, as one or both of you will feel smothered or like he or
she is in a too-codependent relationship. Keep on doing the things you
love while making time for the person you love.
- If you spend time apart doing your own things, then your time together will be more meaningful.
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4
Never stop saying "I love you." It doesn't matter if
you've been together for eight million years. If you want to make a
woman fall for you, and make it last forever, then you have to tell her
that you love her. Do it at least once a day, if not much more often,
and say it like you really mean it, not like you're just saying, "Love
ya!" as you sign-off on an email. These three words can make a big
impact on your life -- and your relationship.
- No matter how secure a woman is in her relationship, she will always like to hear that you love her.
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